14 May 2013
in big government, Christian, comedy, conservative, dogs, funny, golf, guns, Jesus, John David Heaton III, jokes, puppies
Tags: big-brother, conservative-politics, corruption, education, entertainment, film flam, free-speech, united-states, vacation, washington
I was going to rage against the criminals we have in Washington, and around the country who give us laws to follow, yet make themselves exempt. Then I said, “What the heck!” Why let a bunch of murderers and film flam artist ruin my life?
It is time to keep life simple and fun. Being a God believing man, I know how the whole story shakes out. This world takes a dive into the crapper, and just as it is about to implode our Lord and Saviour steps in and returns this Earth to the Eden God intended it to be. In the mean time, I got some things to do this summer. Bowling! yes, once again I am bowling two summer leagues. My Tuesday league is pretty amazing. Probably due to the simple fact that the average age of almost all of the bowlers is 112. Not really, but there are many who are the back side of 70. Which is awesome, because many of them are good. I guess it is no wonder why I like golf and bowling, other than the simp[le facts that I am not to shabby at either one, and I can participate for most of my life span.
Also got to get some fishing in this summer. I am going to join a small fishing club that my dad belonged to when he was alive. I will have to give it a once over. River banks tend to attract elements of our society that stink more than my favorite catfish bait. If all goes well though, I picture quite a few days if fishing with my two pups; BillWilly and B.W.. I have to get my money out of them, seeing I spent my retirement savings when they became ill this past year.
I also need to work on some road trips. Still want to get back to Laughlin Nevada for some golf and fishing on the Colorado River. I also want to try my hand at gold panning too.
Guess all in all I don’t have time to worry about junk I have no control over, though I sure I will from time to time. It is just nice to know, that whatever the heck is going on around me, I still will be enjoying myself.
02 May 2013
in Christian, comedy, funny, John David Heaton III, jokes
Tags: entertainment, jokes
These are actual excuse notes from parents (including original spelling):
My son is under a doctor’s care and should not take P.E. today. Please execute him.
Please excuse Lisa for being absent. She was sick and I had her shot.
Dear School: Please ekscuse John being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and also 33.
Please excuse Roland from P.E. for a few days. Yesterday he fell out of a tree and misplaced his hip.
John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face.
Carlos was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hurt in the growing part.
Megan could not come to school today because she has been bothered by very close veins.
Chris will not be in school cus he has an acre in his side.
Please excuse Ray Friday from school. He has very loose vowels.
Please excuse Tommy for being absent yesterday. He had diarrhea and his boots leak.
Irving was absent yesterday because he missed his bust.
Please excuse Jimmy for being. It was his father’s fault.
I kept Billie home because she had to go Christmas shopping because I don’t know what size she wear.
Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday.
Sally won’t be in school a week from Friday. We have to attend her funeral.
Please excuse Jason for being absent yesterday. He had a cold and could not breed well.
Please excuse Burma, she has been sick and under the doctor.
01 May 2013
in cat, Christian, comedy, funny, Jesus, John David Heaton III
Tags: cat, deaf, kitty, whitey
This is Violet, also known as “Whitey”. Why the heck she likes to hang on top of the door is beyond me. I figure since she is deaf, she needs to see as much as she can.
19 Apr 2013
in Christian, coaching, comedy, conservative, country music, dogs, food, funny, golf, guns, Jesus, John David Heaton III, music, puppies, second amendment
Tags: education, entertainment, fernly nevada, fishing hole, food, free-speech, grapefruit tree, hillbilly, lawn chairs, restaurants, you-cant-make-this-stuff-up
Puppy bellies, beers, beef jerky, no shoes, loud farts, lawn chairs with beer holders, country music playing from a cheap boom box, no shoes, more beer, dogs playing, the smell of lighter fluid on the briquettes, toes in the grass, more beer, peeing on the fence, peeing on the orange tree, more beer, adding enough lighter fluid to the Q to make a mushroom cloud, change Hank jr cd to Hank sr cd, more beer, pee on grapefruit tree, clean the grill over the fire with lighter fluid, pee on the fence again, wash hands and get the meat on the grill, start counting beers that are left, flip meat, more beer, chase dogs from the grill, take shirt off and replace with favorite sleeves shirt that says” Will Work For Beer”, take meat off the grill and into the house, more beer will eat later, scratch puppy bellies, scratch my belly, hike up britches and pee on fence, change cd to Elvis Live at Las Vegas, more beer cause the party is just starting…it is only 7pm!
OK, you get the idea. Lately, I have been looking online at cities that I could move to if they meet the Hillbilly’s standards. Fernly Nevada is looking pretty good. http://www.cityoffernley.org/ I know they have a tavern with karaoke, I need a golf course, bowling alley, and fishing hole.
09 Apr 2013
in comedy, food, funny, golf, John David Heaton III
Tags: music, tuesday
OOPs, too busy for a Tuesday post, so here is my salute to Tuesday!
08 Apr 2013
in big government, Christian, conservative, funny, government drones, gun rights, Jesus, John David Heaton III, liberalism, marxist, NWO, satire
Tags: barack-obama, big-brother, buffalo spring, conservative-politics, corruption, current-events, education, entertainment, free-speech, hillbilly, immigration bill, politics, united-states, washington, you-cant-make-this-stuff-up
Can’t believe I am using a title from a Hippie group like the Buffalo Spring Field band. As many of you know, I have taken a huge break from commenting on national politics. While it has been a refreshing break, and I plan to continue to post 99% of non political stuff, I just have to break the silence today.
I have just about resigned to the fact that our federal government no longer answers, no listens to the average hard-working citizen. I believe that the percentage of AHWC is probably no more than 40% of our population. This leaves a huge block of folks that want stuff for nothing, because they believe they are entitled to it. Mixed into this free-loading population, are the folks that are willing to give the fruits of their labor to these bottom feeders. I stumbled upon an article that talks about Repubs and dems, The Gang of 8, who are working on the sham and shaft, known as immigration Reform. Low and behold, Sr Marco Rubio is part of this group of traitors.
It’s also a problem for Sen. Marco Rubio, who is simultaneously helping to write the bill and preparing to run for president in 2016 as a supporter of the middle-class….
This Hillbilly believes we 35%-40%’ers will have to clump together in states like Texas, Arizona, Missouri, and Idaho and work our way into school boards, PTA, city council seats, and so on. Completely purge any folks who are of the 60%ers out of any type of positions that have any say over our culture,values,religion, borders, and language. It will work, because we did it back in 1776.
OK, I said my peace, so I will now go back into political black.
05 Apr 2013
in Christian, comedy, conservative, funny, Jesus, John David Heaton III
Tags: blown head gasket, cars, control government, entertainment, food, free-speech, news, you-cant-make-this-stuff-up
Last month: $1,500 to save the lives of Bill-Will and B.W. Thank goodness for monthly payments from a good friend who happens to be my vet. Now, I find my reliable truck has a blown head gasket! Nope, I don’t have a good buddy who is a mechanic. I could do it myself, but I lack a couple of important tools to complete the job. Of course, it is a $1,500 repair. Looks like I might be looking for a summer season job.
Ya put these bills together, along with the friggin’ out of control government nailing me for $700, and this good ol’ Hillbilly is left with a whole lot of negative nothin!
28 Mar 2013
in Christian, Christmas, comedy, conservative, funny, Jesus, John David Heaton III, jokes
Tags: current-events, entertainment, free-speech, hillbilly
One of the upsides working for a public school is not always the amount of time of, but the “Days” off. I am a stickler for Christian Holidays as are many of my co-workers. We make sure to go out of our way to say things like, “Christmas”, and “Easter breaks” instead of “Holiday and “Spring Breaks”.
I am so tired of the pandering to the Whiney Minority. It does not cause cancer to hear our read the words Christmas or Easter. I will take this rant a step further. I am tired og the hyphenated American labels. If I see a dude committing a crime, I am giving a physical description….black, white, Asian, male female, fat, skinny,big Hooters, pointy head, hairy ears, pencil neck, ect…
I wonder if there is a white dude sitting in and African school demanding to be called American-African? Of course not! Only in America can you find folks that are so self loathing, they have to create a racial or religious controversy to distract them from their very own short comings.
21 Mar 2013
in food, funny, Jesus, John David Heaton III, jokes
Tags: food, food challenge, food nation, free-speech, habanero peppers, Health, hillbilly, keystone light, restaurants, travel channel
I think it is the Travel Channel that airs Man vs Food, and now called Man vs. Food Nation. I like to see how different places throughout America shovels up their grub. My favorite shows have the host, Adam Richmond, attempting a “hotter than heck” food challenge. Reason being, is that there is not a dish on the planet that is so hot, that this Hillbilly can’t eat it.
Yeah, I hear it all the time from some of my pals. “You would never be able to handle the infamous Ghost Pepper.” Of course, these are the same chuckle heads that bet me I could not eat 5 fresh Habanero peppers. That earned me a week’s supply of Keystone Light:)
So, back to the show. I was thinking that somebody should go into business making the various meals shown on this show. If you have not seen the show, here is a glimpse:
21 Mar 2013
in Christian, comedy, conservative, food, funny, Jesus, John David Heaton III
Tags: canned sardines, dinner, education, entertainment, food, free-speech, hot mustard, hot suace, rib eye steak, vacation, vegetarian
I am not quite sure if I have ten favorite eats…maybe less, might be more. But here is a list of stuff I love to fill my boiler with.
Rib-Eye steak from the grill. I don’t even need any side fixins with this chunk of bovine. About 5-7 minutes a side, and let the blood flow when I bite into it.
A-1 Sauce sandwich. Yup, I love the A-1! I can even swig it from the bottle in a hunger frenzy. A couple of slices of toasted wheat bread, and a healthy pour and I am off to the races. It also works great with a king size dinner roll. Just smash a hole into the roll, and fill with the sauce. Good times.
Grilled jalapenos stuffed with Habaneros peppers. This is a Hillbilly staple. Buy the biggest jalapenos you can get, crop the tops, and stuff the Habaneros in. Put in foil, add a copious amount of butter, and grill. This is insanely good, and hot to boot. Will leave you drooling uncontrollably.
Chocolate cake in a bowl of milk. So flippin good that there is nothing left to say but “give me more”!
Oysters; raw or grilled. Just put them in hot suace and get the party started.
Bacon and Mayo sandwich. Got to be on white bread.
Canned sardines in hot mustard sauce.
Cottage cheese mixed with A-1 sauce. Told you I love the A-1.
OK, I just have made myself to darn hungry to carry on. I am going to bust into my lunch pail right now and have some canned Mackeral and Thousand Island Dressing. No, I will not share.