Why Me Lord?


Why am I always stuck in a grocery line behind the person who has one item, but that item has no price, and it is the last one?

Why do I always get the person at the DMV that has all the answers, but they are not the right ones?

Why do I always find the vending machine that will not take the new quarters?

Why do I always order a draft beer, just as the keg runs out, the bartender is always unable to replace it in a timely manner?

Why do I always think I have picked up all the dog poop in the yard, just as I step in a steamy pile?

Why do my dogs always have to drop a deuce right after I finish mowing the lawn?

Why do I always spill food on my white clothing, and not the black stuff?

Why do I always think I can eat before I go to the dentist, and not have food stuck in my choppers?

Why do I always feel the need to write about stuff that has no bearing on the betterment of the universe?

12 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Linda Vernon
    Jul 23, 2012 @ 19:37:04

    I don’t know why you feel the need to write about stuff like this but I enjoyed it!!

    Reply

  2. Addie
    Jul 24, 2012 @ 00:39:59

    I enjoy reading write-ups like this instead of those that are about the betterment of this and that. :0

    Reply

  3. 68ghia
    Jul 24, 2012 @ 04:08:36

    Murphy looks to be an integral part of your life 😉

    Reply

  4. whiteladyinthehood
    Jul 24, 2012 @ 06:11:28

    These were great! Too funny!

    Reply

  5. bibuji
    Jul 24, 2012 @ 06:30:35

    …because you are a chosen one. Soon you will rewarded by lots of happiness.

    Reply

  6. conhippy
    Jul 24, 2012 @ 08:33:48

    Why NOT you?

    Reply

  7. Debra Colby-Conklin
    Jul 25, 2012 @ 03:51:31

    Because I work at the grocery store and I am in charge of the Karma…and the day begins with treating the cashier with the worship that she deserves.

    Reply

  8. J.G.Brown
    Jul 25, 2012 @ 07:25:38

    oh most highly choosen in response to the question: Why me, why do and why am I; the harm is not in you and way of the the universe says this the code comes to this: I am do me why? I am man I am on top but yet on the bottom in front of yet always being told what to do ask my wife my mother and my girl friend. Murphy said it once no twice maybe three or more, and then he asked his wife again

    Reply

  9. Carl D'Agostino
    Jul 25, 2012 @ 18:08:09

    Why am I still in Miami where 17 people speak English?

    Reply

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