I Don’t Care Underwear

You always hear the clichés like ” wears their emotions on their sleeves” or “they need to put on their big boy pants.” I watch a lot of golf so most of these sayings are sports related. This got my hamster cage rolling. What if there is a clothing line for attitudes and emotions? Nothing better than a crack at fashion humor from a redneck like me!

Don’t care underwear: What a perfect fit! I don’t give a chit chonies. With me, I wear em’ till the explode into a cloud of dust after the final drying. Elastic separated from the cotton, holes throughout. And a nice little brown skid mark in the rear that even industrial bleach can’t remove.

Shut The Heck Up Socks: I often use “put a sock in it” when people I know, or don’t know, bump their gums about crap they don’t know anything about. So why not have a proper sock for the occasion?

Party Shorts: I actually have a working version of these: Cargo shorts! Multiple pockets that are roomy enough for beers, snacks, bottle openers, and what ever fun-loving devices I may have, or find. I would like the pockets to be lined like an ice chest, in order to keep my coolies extra cold.

Why The Heck Not Shirts: Every one of these shirts  have a small pair of dice embroidered on them. Half the things I do in life, either good or bad is a roll of the dice anyways! When I find a small container of leftovers in the fridge and it passes my smell test, I put on my ‘Why the heck not” shirt, heat the stuff up, put some Tabasco on it, and down it!

5 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Paul H. Lemmen
    Dec 04, 2014 @ 12:57:27

    Reblogged this on A Conservative Christian Man.


  2. the unit
    Dec 12, 2014 @ 12:03:55

    You did see where the medical device tax applies to menstrual pad makers? Your skid marks in your shorts likely next. Then a license to defecate and a bowl camera to verify. Your 666 tattooed nearby to substantiate the bill is a “true bill.”


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