Puppy bellies, beers, beef jerky, no shoes, loud farts, lawn chairs with beer holders, country music playing from a cheap boom box, no shoes, more beer, dogs playing, the smell of lighter fluid on the briquettes, toes in the grass, more beer, peeing on the fence, peeing on the orange tree, more beer, adding enough lighter fluid to the Q to make a mushroom cloud, change Hank jr cd to Hank sr cd, more beer, pee on grapefruit tree, clean the grill over the fire with lighter fluid, pee on the fence again, wash hands and get the meat on the grill, start counting beers that are left, flip meat, more beer, chase dogs from the grill, take shirt off and replace with favorite sleeves shirt that says” Will Work For Beer”, take meat off the grill and into the house, more beer will eat later, scratch puppy bellies, scratch my belly, hike up britches and pee on fence, change cd to Elvis Live at Las Vegas, more beer cause the party is just starting…it is only 7pm!
OK, you get the idea. Lately, I have been looking online at cities that I could move to if they meet the Hillbilly’s standards. Fernly Nevada is looking pretty good. http://www.cityoffernley.org/ I know they have a tavern with karaoke, I need a golf course, bowling alley, and fishing hole.
Yup, lets hear it for beer! I have been grinding all week. Three golf matches in extremely windy conditions…..well that ain’t the issue, try three golf matches where I was unable to drink beer afterwards due to the fact the school district does not allow coaches to drink and transport players! Give me the good ol’ days when I was in high school and my building construction teacher kept a twelve pack of Mille High Life bottles in his office fridge. I remember him sending to fetch him an ice pack, and he warned me not to touch his beer. While I did not touch em’, I did stand and stare at em’ like I had found a Playboy magazine. And my history teacher who kept a warm up bottle of bourbon for his morning coffee. Yes, the good old days.
Anyways, I am down to thirty-one working days, which means after today, I am down to six Fridays. Once vacation hits, everyday becomes foamie, and every hour is happy, and this Hillbilly is reminded why he graduated college: To weasel into a job that affords me my chosen lifestyle: Don’t work hard,and make just enough money to drink beer, golf, fish, hit the gym, bbq, and feed the dogs. This is also why God keeps me poor: He knows how dangerous a rich, non-working Hillbilly can be. Charlie Sheem is Charlie Brown compared to me:)
Talk about a whole lot junk piling up in my burn pile. I was driving home tonight from the gym, and I was attempting to tune into my country classics station. Instead, I hit the River;105.5, where everything from the 50’s to 2000’s are played. The singer that is playing is Dylan. No mistaking this guy’s voice, and it was a 60’s tune, because one of the lines had to do with watching out for the “man”. No problem, the Hillbilly likes the song well enough to stick it out and take a listen to the next beat. Well, it is Crosby, Stills, and Nash, featuring Stephen Stills. I like the hippies voice and he plays a mean string box. The song is Dark side, which I have heard maybe once. This is another group of hippies that where all about peace, love, and fighting the man. So I started grinding my gears a bit.
These guys where accusing the federal government, and just about every politician and every conservative white dude of “keeping them down.” For whatever that is worth! So this is where the Hillbilly gets his tractor steaming: The man, and men in power now, who are sticking it the people, are the party of the hippies! Where are the songs about Benghazi? Four Dead in Libya? I guess they don’t want to admit that they Got Fooled Again,and again! They were all for freedom of expression, peace and love. But they don’t raise a guitar pick to defend Christian’s rights.
If BHO looked liked LBJ, there would be gaggle of bald, hippie lettuce smokin’, flip-flop wearin’ folks singing “Give Peace A Chance” all around the country. But hypocrites don’t roll like that I guess.
NBC has come out with another peice of crap show that shows deviant behavior as normal. Give me Leave It To Beaver, Andy Griffith, and old country music. Tell me who you would rather have dating your daughter,sister, or even mom: Bill Maher or Wallace Cleaver?
During a concert in Singapore, Mustaine remarked that President Obama was trying to pass gun control legislation.
“So he’s staging all of these murders, like the ‘Fast And Furious’ thing down at the border, Aurora, Colorado, all the people that were killed there, and now the beautiful people at the Sikh temple,” said Mustaine, before adding, “I don’t know where I’m gonna live if America keeps going the way it’s going because it looks like it’s turning into Nazi America.”
Mustaine has since been savaged by numerous media outlets for his comments despite the fact that the Fast and Furious program, which saw the Obama administration put guns directly in the hands of Mexican drug cartels, has led to the murders of hundreds of people.
However, Mustaine’s suspicion surrounding the recent mass shootings was echoed by Gun Owners of America director Larry Pratt, a respected voice in the gun rights movement, who himself shared his own suspicions about the ‘Batman’ massacre during an interview with Alex Jones last month.
Yup, The Billy is having a birthday on Tuesday, the 22nd of May. I don’t really celebrate it cause back in 97 pop past, so pretty much took the beer out of the mug for me. But this year, I am going to allow a small celebration.
I am so blessed: 47 years young and still can see my toes, and physically do what I gotta do! This allows me to spout my mind,and not worry about much of the mess other folks think about me. I know the more mature I get, the more I just want to be left alone.
So once the work day is done tomorrow, it is off to a quite site where the suds are icy, and the help don’t know who I am. Just hopin’ the juke box got a lot of George Jones and Waylon Jennings, and pop figures a way to get me a free beer!
God Bless ya’ll. 🙂
Proud Military Mom's Common Sense Blog
Just a working class, empty nesting, life long Democrat disgusted with the DNC, the Democratic Party, the ‘RULZ’ Committee and the power brokers who think we should all fall in line and vote for the selectee. Country before party every time!
0
Right Wing Theocrat
Yes liberals, your worst nightmares about Conservatives, Christian theocracies, gun toting, hanging pedophiles, lowering taxes, burning your pot, making you work and all that are really true.
0
theconservativehillbilly 
Recent Comments