68 of 73

Yup, day 68 of my 73 days of summer vacation. Sorry for the lack of postings and visitations, but the first week of vacation is always a busy one: Beers, golf,bowling,fishing, and gym time slows this Hillbilly blogger way down. No worries, I will be easing back into the saddle here shortly.

God Bless you all.
John

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More Golf Pictures….

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When A Ford And A Chevy……

This Merle song is an awesome commentary on today’s life in America. Here is my list of thoughts in no particular order or reason!

Hyphenated American labels: You know, Japanese, Chinese, African. Whatever happened to just being an American of “fill in the blank” decent.

Owning up to your bad choices, and not blaming your mamma, daddy, or position in life….or the color of your skin.

Calling bull crap when somebody says, or does something stupid. To a Christian Conservative like myself, “Stupid” has the same definition as “Porn”. Ya know it when you see it.

Giving thanks in public for the Man upstairs and not giving a rat’s rear what others think.

Buying pants that fit correctly, and don’t have stupid sayings on them. Goes for shirts too.

Not buying clothing that promotes communist or socialist revolutionaries.

Making fun of public figures that cry when they get rolled up for doing something stupid or illegal.

Not being ashamed to fail.

George Jones Passes: My BoomBox Buddy

This is a crusher, and I am not usually a affected by the death of a performer I never met. But George is different. Not only is he my favorite, but was my pop’s favorite too. Can’t tell ya how many beers I have guzzled listening to George’s songs.

Beer Shoes

While Beer Goggles grab all the fame and glory, Beer Shoes is the foundation of any professional beer drinker. Beer Shoes, from here on will be addressed as BS, does all the heavy lifting. They are the pair that gets you to the place beer is sold. Without BS, the fridge would not be stocked, and the ice chest would be for ever lonely.

My BS travel with me where ever I go. They relax in my golf bag during a round, resting up for the 19th hole. Were they gladly appear, replacing the heavy, and some time odorous golf shoes. To sit happily upon my flippers, watching me smoothly consume my frosty beverage buddies, one by one.

They also wait patiently in the trunk, while their owner works his digits to bone. When the light fills the trunk, and they are called into action, they don’t miss a beat. BS have dangers that lurk: gravel, dung, dirt, and the always terminal broken strap. The old saying “Don’t knock a fella til you walk a mile in his shoes” is a good one, but “Never forget the importance of BS” is great!

A Friday In The Hilbillyverse

Puppy bellies, beers, beef jerky, no shoes, loud farts, lawn chairs with beer holders, country music playing from a cheap boom box, no shoes, more beer, dogs playing, the smell of lighter fluid on the briquettes, toes in the grass, more beer, peeing on the fence, peeing on the orange tree, more beer, adding enough lighter fluid to the Q to make a mushroom cloud, change Hank jr cd to Hank sr cd, more beer, pee on grapefruit tree, clean the grill over the fire with lighter fluid, pee on the fence again, wash hands and get the meat on the grill, start counting beers that are left, flip meat, more beer, chase dogs from the grill, take shirt off and replace with favorite sleeves shirt that says” Will Work For Beer”, take meat off the grill and into the house, more beer will eat later, scratch puppy bellies, scratch my belly, hike up britches and pee on fence, change cd to Elvis Live at Las Vegas, more beer cause the party is just starting…it is only 7pm!

OK, you get the idea. Lately, I have been looking online at cities that I could move to if they meet the Hillbilly’s standards. Fernly Nevada is looking pretty good. http://www.cityoffernley.org/ I know they have a tavern with karaoke, I need a golf course, bowling alley, and fishing hole.

Another Foamie Friday

Yup, lets hear it for beer! I have been grinding all week. Three golf matches in extremely windy conditions…..well that ain’t the issue, try three golf matches where I was unable to drink beer afterwards due to the fact the school district does not allow coaches to drink and transport players! Give me the good ol’ days when I was in high school and my building construction teacher kept a twelve pack of Mille High Life bottles in his office fridge. I remember him sending to fetch him an ice pack, and he warned me not to touch his beer. While I did not touch em’, I did stand and stare at em’ like I had found a Playboy magazine. And my history teacher who kept a warm up bottle of bourbon for his morning coffee. Yes, the good old days.

Anyways, I am down to thirty-one working days, which means after today, I am down to six Fridays. Once vacation hits, everyday becomes foamie, and every hour is happy, and this Hillbilly is reminded why he graduated college: To weasel into a job that affords me my chosen lifestyle: Don’t work hard,and make just enough money to drink beer, golf, fish, hit the gym, bbq, and feed the dogs. This is also why God keeps me poor: He knows how dangerous a rich, non-working Hillbilly can be. Charlie Sheem is Charlie Brown compared to me:)

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